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Tom
December 15th, 2013, 09:44 AM
I didn't collect these. A friend sent them. Some are funny.


No matter how big or how bad you are, if a two year old hands you a phone,
you'll answer it.

A pixel is a terrible thing to waste.

You have the right to remain sentient. If you give up the right to remain sentient,
you will be elected to public office

If a man speaks in the forest and no woman hears him, is he still wrong ?

Give a man a password, he'll log in for a day.
Teach him to code, and he will hack his way in...

It's no longer a question of staying healthy. It's a question of finding a sickness
you like.

It isn't easy being the parent of a six-year-old. However, it's a pretty small price
to pay for having somebody around the house who understands computers.

I read TFA and all I got was this lousy cookie

Yeah I broke it. But I have Duck tape so its ok.

I'm so fast, when I turn off the light, i'm in bed before the room gets dark

Save the Earth! Collect the entire set!

Whoever said: 'A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush' hasn't been putting his
bird into the right bush!

Understanding the scope of the problem is the first step on the path to true panic

There are two types of people in the world: Those who crave closure

Brute force - if it doesn't work, you're just not using enough

Always remember, whenever you declare someone the dumbest person on Earth, someone
else will stare at their screen intently, cross their arms and say ‘Challenge
accepted’.

If you fall, I'll be there. -- floor
(You can always rely on gravity to bring you down.)

Think about how stupid the average person is. Now, realise that half of them are
dumber than that. - George Carlin

Some drink at the fountain of knowledge. Others just gargle.

[regarding privacy]
"Nail that sticks out gets hammered in." - attributed as Japanese proverb

No left turn unstoned

Five out of four people have trouble with fractions

I was promised a flying car. Where is my flying car?

The US Constitution isn't perfect, but it's a lot better than what we have now.

Popsgarage
December 15th, 2013, 09:52 PM
Funny stuff.

The StRanger
December 15th, 2013, 10:08 PM
I like them !

Jim
December 18th, 2013, 09:05 AM
You never see a motorcycle parked outside a psychiatrists' office.

The StRanger
December 18th, 2013, 12:02 PM
The goal in life is not to arrive at the grave beautiful and unscathed, but.
To slide in sideways, busted up, broken & bleeding.... Screeming "" gawd what a ride ""

The StRanger
December 18th, 2013, 12:05 PM
I have Three voices in my head.. Two say the world is a beautiful place..
The 3rd one is sreeming.. Pull the trigger, they all deserve it !!

ColoJeeper
December 18th, 2013, 02:15 PM
“The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense.”
― Tom Clancy